I realised that throughout my working career, I've always studied while working. I've taken Chinese classes, completed the Children Ministry Training Programme certification, studied a year of Biblical Greek, completed my professional certification (Chartered Institute of Management Accounts), completed my Diploma and Advanced Diploma in Anti-Money Laundering and now doing my degree in Theology, Ministry and Missions. 

My colleagues are puzzled when I say I'm doing my degree. The first expression would be, "You don't have a degree? I thought you are a graduate?" and the next question will always be "What degree are you doing?" and because I know the reaction I will get when I tell them what degree I'm doing, often times I try not to mention it and tell them "Yeah, I'm doing another degree. I love studying." Not that I really love studying in particular but it seems like that answer appeases their curiosity. But for those who do find out what I'm studying, the next questions are almost always, "What course is that?" followed by "Why, do you want to be a priest/ pastor?"

So why am I doing Bible College? Well, it's something I have wanted to do. I wanted to go off for a year or 2 right after finishing my SPM but it wasn't something that I could do back then. Then I tried finding for opportunities throughout my working life but somehow nothing seemed to work out. And August 2018, about a week before the first week of class while sitting in office, SPTC came to mind and I browse the website. Since I don't know much about SPTC, I thought I'll just drop a "query" to find out about the course which in turn became an interview, a book review submission for admission and here I am today in Year 2! 

God does has His own timing. His own ways. Reading my journal entries, Bible College was one of my prayer items when I was in College. Well, God answer that prayer many years later but He answered that prayer way much better than I expected. I wanted to go overseas and study but God sent UK to Malaysia so that I can still keep my job (yes, financing wise would have been crazy overseas) and still study Theology. I'm amazed and truly humbled that God would give me such an opportunity. What more to study Theology in an environment that values worship and ministry and not just focus on the theology aspect of it. 

I remember end of July 2018 when I got my car (yes, another story of God's amazing-ness) and the number plate was BPP,  I felt that the Lord was telling me to 'Be Prepared'. For what I don't know but I do know that this season of studying Theology is part of that "being prepared". 

And so far, I've been blown away many times over with all the crazy discoveries about God as I dig in Scripture and follow the ancient paths of the Church. Yes, there are days when it challenges what I have believed about God but hasn't that always be the tension of the church? To test everything? So that this faith that I have is 'real'. It's not borrowed, it's not someone else's, it's mine after I struggle and wrestle through it. 

But no, knowledge is not to puff up. It's not to feel good about how much I know about God. Such a pity if all these studying is merely for a certificate or just to have more knowledge. No, studying theology has made me realised how little I know and how much more dependent on God I need to be. I'm glad that the experience has also helped me in my ministry to the OA and the people that God has placed around me. 

Is there more to this? Well, I'm sure there will be. Trust God to take you out of your comfort zone. Blow your mind and leave you breathless. If it's something that I can plan or imagine then it won't be God, it would be me. So for now, it's taking the word - wrestling with it,  drown in the reading materials and struggle with the assignments but it will be worth it! 

Waymaker

Miracle Worker

Promise Keeper

Light in the darkness

My God

That is who You are

Even when I can't feel it, You're working

You never stop, You never stop working

Last Monday last minute plans...

and thereafter Mykori tea for the Birthday Girl. 

Now, what's for this long weekend? Can there be more long weekends every month? 

Approximately 3 more weeks and I'm bond free. One year has indeed flown by so quickly. The past one year can be summarized as 'unpredictable'.

When I sign the offer letter, I was prepared for the bureaucracy, slow paced culture, conservative dressing and maybe 'conservative eating' . Well, all that did happened with much much more, more than I anticipated or was prepared for.

I wasn't prepared to lose my boss within 6 months, to be boss-less for 3 months, get a new boss, restructuring, an extension of job scope to my already stretched scope, a wide variety of daily dramas and politics.

Rewind to a few months back... I was ready to throw in the towel especially when my boss was asked to leave and things were quite tough in office. With an offer of another FI buying me out and an increase in salary... it just seem so tempting. I'm thankful that God affirmed through a visiting speaker at the Christian Fellowship, the day when I received the fateful news with the following words "I want to reestablish your purpose here. To be a light and testimony". He shared that he felt that was what God wants some of us at the fellowship to hear. God is indeed timely as these were words during my devotions too. A much needed word and encouragement. I'm also thankful for friends that kept me going along the way by praying with me, processing my thoughts / feelings with me and reminding me of the the reason why I came in the first place. Without the support, I'm not sure if I could have stayed on. 

In hindsight, I'm glad I stayed on. Things worked out somehow. In light of the adversity, the team bonded together. God brought new ones on board that made the journey lighter. Yes, there are so many of my department colleagues joining the Christian Fellowship now toooo.. Although, I'm overwhelm with the workload and the ongoing dramas and politics, but the 'experience' as a whole has been invaluable. I don't know how many more days or months or years, the Lord will have me here but He has promised - Deuteronomy 31:6 So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the LORD your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.

It's such a coincidence too that Sue and I celebrated the last working day of August with my former boss & Lit Seen and celebrated my new boss birthday on the first working day of September. Didn't know it was Inn Sann's birthday till almost lunch time but managed to squeeze in a random lunch treat for her with Sue and a department surprise bday tea. Almost seems as if it's a close of one chapter and the beginning of the next. 

Well, I thank God for the past one year. It's been a crazy ride. Truly unpredictable but I'm safe in the hands of the God that more than predicts - He KNOWS the future. Thank you too to the lovely people that has journeyed with me in this roller coaster ride. 

Can't believe how 1st year of Bible College has passed so quickly. I'm still amazed that God has made this possible for me.

2019/2020 Cohort 

First class of the week

Year 2 starts of with a week long intensive week. Not having to travel to and fro from home helps especially with work equally demanding. The extra sleep is a plus point and it's great not needing to navigate through the crazy KL traffic.

Today especially has been a bummer day. My shoe gave way in the morning and I had to go to my car and change them. This was a blessing in disguise as I would otherwise not know that the sheltered parking was dripping water that contained rust on my car windscreen. (horror of horrors) but yes, still bump over the rust stains on my car windscreen which I can only get it off probably over the weekend and I hope it does come off.

Stained glass 

Then I injured my foot not sure if I sprained it or its a muscle pull and had to limp around in office... and it didn't help that I was late for class (again... But even later today) and arrived just after worship ended.

And what more, the 104th Archbishop of Canterbury sat next to me the whole of class time and was eager to be my discussion partner... How nerve wrecking...but awesome!!! More like he was giving me private tuition since I don't have any valuable information to bring to the table. He's so humble and really inspiring. He talks about God with a sparkle in his eyes. 

Interestingly, while walking back to YWCA, I realised I'm not limping anymore. Thank God for that! :)

Interlude - a short period when a situation or activity is different from what comes before and after it

The word wait is an unpopular word in my vocabulary list. Whenever I am told to wait, everything inside of me will look for ways to quicken the process. That feeling heightens when I already have a plan in mind and I am eager to execute it. When I have a lunch appointment and my boss is engaged in a discussion but I need to get the document approve before lunch. My brain thinks of 101 ways to get my boss to sign off the document so that I can go off for lunch. And traffic lights, it always seems as if they just know when you are rushing and flash the red light to keep you waiting. 

There are many other times when I have been asked to wait and trust me these moments of 'waiting' seems forever. If I have a choice, I will choose 'go' rather than 'wait'. But yet the ways of God seems to be the opposite. The Bible is filled with verses on 'wait'. 'Wait on the Lord', 'Wait for the coming of the Lord', 'Wait for the harvest', 'Wait for the vision to be fulfilled'etc. 

The season of waiting is like an Interlude. It is a short period (often time it feels like a long period... too long), that is in between from what comes before and after it. And just like watching musicals or watching the orchestra, the show has been good. I've been enjoying the performance and I dread it when the house lights come on for an intermission. I want the show to go on. I fidget around. I squirm in my seat. I stare at the time hoping it moves faster. I feel restless but however long that the intermission is, the show will resume and the moment the house lights are turn off, my restlessness during the intermission is forgotten. But the question remains , why must there be an intermission? 

The problem stems in my perspective. I look at the period of intermission from the perspective of an audience. I'm sitting in the audience and  enjoying the performance. The intermission is seen as a disruption but if I look at the intermission from the players / the actors, the intermission will be a period that I welcome. It is a time to rest. A time to re-look at the notes that I need to play after the intermission or perhaps the lines that I need to sing out. I enjoy the time on the stage entertaining the crowd but I also know how important the time of intermission is, it gives me the break so that I can advance further. And once the intermission is over, it is show time! 

So now.... when is show time! but meanwhile, perhaps I need to take a pause and re-look at my lines..