I don't like it when I can't do anything about a problem and can't come up with a solution. Most of the time I am forced into such a situation and I am so frustrated but probably that is the only way I am stopped in my tracks to ponder and really realising that I am not capable and just helpless.

Knowing is one thing but really bringing it from the head to the heart is tough.

Will be moving out to the working world in about less than a year's time. The place where the lofty perks are. Can't believe it but its true that when you are in a place where you are allowed to choose its not easy. So much of me saying God let Your will be done. A struggle that is continuous.

For the past one week I have been thinking about what career I would like to do in the next couple of years and what I would like to achieve. I am suppose to be focusing on passing my CIMA exams (which I tell you I am far from being able to pass at the rate things are going) but my mind is like some little unsettle kid jumping up and about as if I am graduating soon.

I said that I want the Lord's hand in my life and also directing my path but so fast I tell Him what I want practically giving Him the directions on how to lead me instead. Before I even finish my day dream, He reminded me about where is He in all this. Not to mention that day itself during prayer they shared about the exact passage of Lot and Abram and how sometimes what we think is good and right may not be so and how we should not look at others and envy their success because if the Lord is at hand then He is.

Today, I was looking at my friend's facebook profile. She's same age with me and she has a little baby already. Just looking at her baby and her just kick in the reality that I am an adult now. Don't get me wrong I am not jealous nor wanting one anytime soon. Its nice seeing the little girl in her mum's arms but sends the chills down mine. Gosh! A mum at this age? She makes a great one though. Salute her for her courage! Was quite funny when I saw she named her little girl the same name with one of my good friends. =)